2005-A couple was making out in front of the DJ table and were told to move for they were tapping into the table. They moved across to the other side right in front of the speakers. The guy went to kiss the girl again and she was not expecting it. She was pushed back into the equipment; knocking all of it over, the cds in a puddle and my cell phone was done. NOTE: We found his license an hour afterwards and announced all night that he was an asshole. We gave the license back like idiots.

2005-A drunk friend, is a professional DJ, decided to yell on my microphone, whenever I spoke. He would yell "Culo" every three minutes. I could not do much for I like this guy and he is friends with others I know. Needless to say, I never played his request and he ruined (honestly) my parade day last year. He still brings it up like it was cool. NOTE: After he left, I announced that the "Culo" man was a tool and the staff applauded. His friends (also my friends) didn't like it. I did not use his name for I still consider him a friend. Although, after he reads this, he may not want to be my friend anymore.

(to show I can pick on myself)
2002---The day started with rain, lots of it. All the bartenders and myself that were outside started drinking mad shots. Lots of Tequila. (This was the last time I drank tequila on purpose). Then, a miracle happened. The sun came out and within an hour, the crowds were ridiculous. Being half in the bag, I was still in control. Then my coworkers from Shout, in Plainfield, showed up. Being an idiot, I accepted a minimum of six more tequila shots. I was hammered. I began to yell "Make Some Fucking Noise" over the microphone, a plethora of times. The neighbors on 18th Ave heard it. Not only was it the most embarrassing DJ event of my life, I got in a "little" trouble and still get my balls busted to this day. Thus, no more drinks til at least 5 and no more shots before 7.

1997-(still worked inside). It was midday and normal parade craziness. Bacardi Arti and myself had three girls in the booth with us. Being that I have a lack of game and was a fat kid at the time, Arti was working on these girls. He had these girls doing all kinds of crazy shit and then came the c blockers. You know the guys, I don't have to explain who they are. And, yes they had a ringleader with permission to be in the booth. This fellow MC walked in and started trying to molest the girls and pull their pants off. Nevertheless, they did not smack him. Nor, did they smack Bacardi Arti. They smacked the fat DJ. Me…..I went on a diet the next day.

2000---Time is approximately 4:00. At beach bar, there are people as far as the eyes can see. One redneck from Jackson (surprised) decided that the only two songs he wanted to hear was either Allman Bros or Slayer. Oh yeah, he said he would settle for Dio. Thanks…..Anyway, after being told nicely that it wasn't going to happen, he began to argue with me and every patron he saw. He proceeded to take his ½ yard of beer and pour it over my head. I was automatically shocked and started to flip out, but before I can get a chance, two professional wrestlers came by and pile-drived this asshole into the ground. Before he left the bar, he had bruises all over and he was actually saved by the Bar A bouncers.

For more stories, please come to the beach bar at Bar A from Noon to Nine or Ten and have some drinks with me. In all seriousness, parade day, in Belmar at Bar A, is the greatest bar event I have ever been a part of. This year to celebrate my tenth parade, we will have 200 shirts to give away honoring the event. They are partially sponsored by my newest official sponsor, GLENY.COM. As long as you wear the shirt, you get one for free.

If I offended anyone in this article, I apologize and no guidos were harmed in the making of these stories.

If you have any comments or questions, you can contact me through my website at moderndj.com

See you on the 5th.-DJ Dave